please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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