We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
we made out on top of his cat.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Randomize
