Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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