i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
