I'm going to jail i love you
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
