Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
