I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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