New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
