I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
