I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize