the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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