just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
