Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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