dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
oh god the rape fog is back!
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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