We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
