Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
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