They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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