Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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