I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize