"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
