WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
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