We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
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