return my video game
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
