she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
