there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
