Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
