He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
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