I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize