You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
