Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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