I want to have your abortion
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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