real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize