Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize