I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
