I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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