That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
