Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
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