I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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