fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize