I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
