Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
My vagina just recognized that song.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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