is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
