there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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