yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I didn't notice because vodka
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
