Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
That accounts for only three of the penises
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Randomize