i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
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