4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize