carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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