I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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