You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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