Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?

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(812): View more from Indiana

Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate

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(214): View more from Texas

Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this

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(425): View more from Washington

Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.

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(616): View more from Michigan

She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.

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(+61): View more from Australia

i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?

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(201): View more from New Jersey

on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit

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(907): View more from Alaska

i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went

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